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| I know not what I do. |
Believe me when I tell you. Evertsen men have enormous heads. My brother Zak's nickname in HS was HEAD. So no, I cannot wear large hats.
Before I continue, please allow me a few minutes to give you a rundown of my athletic life up until now.
Growing up in a small community in southern Missouri, sports were a class, not a choice. From grades 5-8, unless you were physically or mentally unable, you played sports.
Cross country, softball, basketball and track. Same coach and usually the same shoes.
Regardless of your natural ability, knowledge of the game or desire to play, you were placed on a team.
A team for awesome
B team for not awesome.
Since most of my youth was spent fishing, building something with my brothers or watching the 3 stooges on VHS, my sports knowledge was minimal at best.
My father didn't grow up in a sports house. So naturally, neither did we. He taught us actual useable life skills. The nerve.
I learned what I could from my seat on the bench and spent most of my 5-8th grade career hanging with the B team. It's not that I couldn't play. Well, yes it probably was. But I didn't want to be told I had to play. Give me a choice, make me earn it, don't just hand me a seat on the bench coach, I wanna be proud of that seat!
To this day, I couldn't tell you what position I was playing on the Basketball court. I just knew it as "left".
With High School came girls. I had been chasing the same ones since kindergarten and the hallways were now filled with new faces. The freshman football team was a sausage fest, so I set my sights on other activities. Ones that included coed bus trips, night practices, hotels and usually singing.. Lot's of singing. You do what you've gotta do.
Opportunities for organized sports after grade 12 are limited and most often, are filled with ex-athletes who can't let go of the glory days. Witnessing a grown man throw a fit, at a city softball game triggers my instant lack of interest. So i've been doing Crossfit for the past few years with increasing and decreasing commitment levels.
So when a friend suggested I come play hockey, I listened. When he explained that there was an actual
C-TEAM! I was in. Could it really be? Could I actually pay money to learn an expensive sport with others who stink as bad as I do? It was a challenge I couldn't turn down.
I will say this. What I lack in hockey knowledge, I make up for in lack of ice skating knowledge.
So, back to the dark closet of padded gear.
Incredibly, I found a helmet that fit, face cage included. I strapped on the needed equipment and off we went.
As my friend and I walked, (I wobbled) down the hallway towards the rink, I can only assume he was looking forward to skating it up with his new hockey buddy. He had recruited someone! This someone hadn't given any indication that he was clueless, so this should be a nice hour of bro time. I on the other hand was thinking the opposite. In about thirty seconds, this guy is gonna know i'm a fraud. I never told him I could skate, but I never told him I couldn't either. Well, here goes.
The next hour went exactly as you'd imagine. He promptly & understandably ditched me for a pick up game, while I began "skating" back and forth across the rink, wondering what I had gotten myself into. I had been on the ice for five minutes and the shame level was at its peak. I had clearly underestimated the challenge.
Forget hitting a puck, that wasn't even on the radar. The stick was merely another prop to make myself feel better. In the hour I spent on the ice, I took a swing at one puck. Of course I missed, spun around and ended up on my side. Which surprisingly, didn't hurt one bit. Hockey pads are amazing!
My wife Amber showed up as promised, a few minutes before our time was up. I quickly jumped up from the bench and watched her scan the players, expecting to find me engaged in a high speed race for a puck, or sneaking my way towards the goal for a point. She smiled her biggest smile when she saw me shuffling towards her. She gave me a hug and snapped a picture as I posed proudly. My smile hiding the reality that had just unfolded over the past hour.
I begin a 6 week skating course after the holidays. I plan on tracking my progress after each class and reporting any successes, as minor as they may be. I invite you to follow along, cheer for me in the comments and send me any advice you may have.
Thanks for reading
Casey
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| Deceiving, isn't it? |
